FORGIVENESS

I dream of corpses and lovers 

dream that another day is impossible 

dream that these grey skies will never leave

the undecided snow falls to the ground

leaves still won't come and birds in packs fly for their lives to warmer climes

If only I could take a chance again 

surely now

now anything is possible but still time clings to me

It is in my bones now he said

but he still had no forgiveness I could not even give him that 

my mother knew better than to ask.

All who come to my door no better than to ask.

 

TWO HOURS OF MADNESS

I went for a coffee before the play thought it might wake me up a bit.

She asked for a name and I told her Marc 

She said bark and I told her I know I look like an old dog but it is Marc

Everybody laughed and I went up to the circle 

The usher said it had already started and took me in

I had a strong desire to put my arm around her

she asked to see my ticket again

then she told me I was in the wrong theatre and had to go downstairs to the Lytleton.

I found my seat and ended up sitting next to a cracker we had a little chat and I thought my day might be getting better.

The play started with everybody talking over each over Cunt after fuck after cunt it was the most base play I had ever heard and nobody does base like me.

At the break I was looking forward to chatting up the bird next to me and telling her how beautiful she was 

she ran off to the toilet as I wandered around when she came back she decided to move seats which just about finished me off for the day.

 

DRIP DRIP

Every time I walk into the back garden I see that tap 

how it leaks away 

drip 

drip

 it gets under my skin because I know it is trying to tell me something 

time is running out it is saying 

you will walk out of here one day and it will be up 

you will be out of time 

drip 

drip 

it goes like a lot of things taunting and taunting 

telling me if you you  going to do it you best do it now 

tomorrow 

is 

too late

 

OFF THE WAGON

I start laughing as I walk into the coffee shop

and the woman who looks a bit like a man asks if I am alright.

Yea I say thought I saw something funny.

I didn't tell her I thought I saw a dog with a condom on outside

she may have thought I was cracking up.

I waited for my coffee looking at all the women asking them in my head who wanted my seed.

They all looked a bit disgusted at me.

I had my coffee and walked out 

lots of women started to smile at me and I knew I was in trouble.

It normally goes this way when I stop drinking for a bit.

People give me hope that  suppose I don't want 

So I went home fell asleep and hit the bottle that night 

On the wagon off the wagon  what difference does it make.